Thursday, August 28

Looking back on Life

With my grandma in hospital after a bad fall (for the Nth time). This was the most serious ever, resulting in stitches, and blood clot.

It was a critical period, but guess she has more or less pulled through. 2 days in deep sleep, she finally opened her eyes. Just so that having a life saved, but to be permanently bed-ridden and forever to be fed by tubes. Half her left body is paralysed due to stroke, and she can hardly open her eyes, not to mention speak to us. Unable to communicate, we cannot know what she is thinking of.

For a moment, there was a scary part of having to make a decision to let your loved ones to go, or to prolong their life (or even agony). A practical decision, or an emotional one. The dilemma persists. Prolonging a life can be expensive, and mentally draining. But not doing so, will seem like having a heart of stone, and filial piety thrown to the dogs.

At the prime of our life, we think we are invincible. But have we done our best or even start living a life of meaning? Grandma worked very hard all her life, and she was always happily busy looking after the family. Strong and agile in the past, at the age of 84, she succumbed to the wear and tear on her physical body.

I'm sure one day, we will reach a stage whereby the body is beyond repair. It is scary to even think of it. But it's also a reminder to do anything that you really want to, before age hits you. Now that my grandma has reached this age, i fear the day when my parents reach the stage. i pray that they will be healthy always.

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